#InHisWords Harvey Watson

Earlier in my career, I believed leadership was about capacity, the ability to hold more, cope better, and stay composed no matter what was happening around me. When things were difficult, my instinct was to double down. Eventually, I realised that this version of leadership increases personal pressure and leaves little room for genuine honesty, with yourself or with others.

A key change in my practice has been understanding that sustainable leadership rests on healthy boundaries and authentic connection. When leaders have spaces where they can speak openly, share the load, and acknowledge their limits, the work becomes far more manageable.

School leadership roles come with their fair share of pressures. Many leaders step into roles without extensive preparation or structural support, and reports of burnout, stress and poor retention appear regularly. It is easy to feel as though the expectation of these roles are that you should simply endure it. I have certainly experienced that. But over time, I have learned that endurance is not a badge of honour. Pushing through does not make the work sustainable, let alone enjoyable. Understanding yourself and being honest with others is essential to creating a professional space that is meaningful and impactful.

Build a Circle

Early in my leadership journey, I completed an activity called the ‘leadership circle’, where I was asked to identify five people we could genuinely trust for honest feedback. I struggled. My professional world was small and most of my interactions at that time were internal.

That changed when I began working with a mentor who encouraged me to widen that circle. I reached out to former colleagues, attended learning sessions with people from very different contexts, and let myself speak openly about what was challenging. None of this felt natural at first. But having a strong group outside my daily environment has been a genuinely positive shift in my professional life.

They offer perspective, not pressure. They are not caught in the internal context, and their distance helps to lower the emotional temperature of my work. Today, when things become heavy, I am not carrying them alone. This circle has helped me become calmer, more grounded, and more able to respond rather than react.

Clarity is Essential

In the past, I found myself taking on work that would have been better shared. This was not intentional, but it meant that others were not always given the space to develop.

Developing clearer roles and distributing leadership changed that. At SASY, the Chief Executive’s support was significant. Their willingness to name issues early, create new roles, and back people to step into them enabled real progress. Creating space for people to step into roles that suited their strengths reduced the mental load I had accumulated, allowed others to flourish, and freed me up to step into work which I found professionally fulfilling. It also strengthened trust. When everyone understands their role, the work becomes shared rather than absorbed by a few.

A recent parent and caregiver evening demonstrated this clearly. Staff stepped naturally into their responsibilities and led a fantastic learning session. It allowed me to step back and appreciate the work others were leading. The tough conversations required to build these structures were worth it. They shifted the sense that I needed to be across everything all the time and instead created a culture where responsibility is collective, not individual.

Boundaries are Healthy

For all the structural supports in the world, the hardest lessons have been personal. Leadership often blurs boundaries, with work creeping into evenings and weekends. Over time, this inevitably erodes wellbeing. I remember being mentally absent with mates because I was ruminating on something that could easily wait until Monday.

What helps me now are routines that keep me grounded and remind me of what I can control. Bike rides, runs, and walks home signal that the workday has ended, and I now see reading, writing, and playing video games not as indulgences, but essential ways of staying connected to myself. When these routines and permission structures are in place, it is much easier to hit reply on that coffee catch-up with a friend I have not seen for too long.

Deleting emails from my phone was another game-changer. It sounds small, but removing the constant drip of notifications protected the mental space I need to be fully present. For me, digital watches are an even worse dopamine manipulator than phones. If something is truly urgent, someone will call.

These boundaries do not distance me from the work. They make me a steadier, calmer version of myself, and in my experience, people appreciate calmness in their leaders.

You Don’t Need Permission to Look After Yourself

No leader is immune to stress or pressure. There is no point where wellbeing is ‘sorted’. What I have learned, and continue to learn, is that sustainable leadership is not an act of endurance, but the result of a deliberate design process. If your workplace supports you to feel that your contribution is meaningful, impactful, and part of a wider life, then the role is worth doing. Anything less is selling yourself short.

If workplaces want leadership that lasts, these habits cannot sit at the edges. They need to be built into the fabric of the work itself. Opportunities like wellbeing days and flexible work are not luxuries but genuine investments in individuals. I am fortunate to be in a space which recognises and champions this.

About the Author
Harvey Watson is the Head of Student Outcomes at Specialised Assistance School for Youth (SASY). He focuses on creating positive, holistic learning environments where young people feel supported to grow.

Further Reading & Resources

For leaders interested in exploring wellbeing, sustainable leadership, and authentic connection further, the following books offer practical guidance and inspiration:

1. Leading Wellbeing – Fleur Heazlewood (2023)
   A practical guide for leaders to build confidence in supporting mental health and wellbeing at work. Focuses on psychological safety, difficult conversations, and creating a supportive culture.

2. The Leader’s Guide to Wellbeing – Dr Audrey Tang
   Offers exercises and strategies to integrate personal and team wellbeing into everyday leadership practice.

3. True North: Discover Your Authentic Leadership – Bill George & Peter Sims
   Explores authentic leadership, self-awareness, and leading in alignment with personal values — supporting honest, sustainable leadership.

4. Leadership Dynamics and Wellbeing: Perspectives from the Front Line – Theo H. Veldsman & Andrew J. Johnson
   Discusses leadership identity, resilience, and preventing burnout, bridging theory and real-world leadership experiences.

5. Dare to Lead – Brené Brown
   Focuses on courage, vulnerability, and building connection - essential skills for creating psychologically safe and meaningful workplaces.

6. The Leadership Challenge – Kouzes & Posner
   Highlights practices that sustain leadership and help leaders inspire and empower others.